A life without problems does not exist. It’s just that these problems need to be managed well. As the saying goes, “a problem shared is a problem halved”. And it’s true, one always feels better for sharing and unloading with a confidante. But you need to make sure you share with wisdom! If you share things that are sensitive with the wrong person, you may just find that life gets a whole lot more complicated.

I like to discuss troubles with good listeners, rather than people who always want to offer a solution, unless of course I am asking for specific advice. There’s nothing worse than a “know it all” who thinks they have a solution for every problem known to man.

Listening is a deep skill that takes great sensitivity, care and compassion. If you share with a know it all, chances are you will come away from the conversation feeling worse than before. You’ll probably feel rage, fury and anger all at the same time! But when you have shared with someone who is simply able to listen deeply, and who can reflect back to you in away that enables you to help solve the problem, then you will walk away with a weight off your shoulders.

We should all develop the many facets of listening. Listening mindfully. Listening with compassion. Listening with love. Listening and reflecting. Listening and questioning. Listening without need to advise. These are all important skills. I don’t believe they are taught in schools but I think they should. These are the soft skills that smooth off the rough edges of day to day life.

As human beings, we seldom get either of these right all of the time. But it’s something tat we can work on.

Share with wisdom and listen mindfully.

In Health and Wellness

Ranjit